Home.

There are so many things I could talk about in regard to being a TCK, that I am having trouble finding a starting point. After much deliberating, I decided to go with the topic of 'home'. For most, 'home' is one place, and has always been that one place. For a TCK it is much different. Personally, what I call 'home' varies, and often I feel like I have more than one 'home'. At the moment, Cardiff is home, but at the same time so is Hanoi. For Easter break I am going 'home'; I am going to Hanoi. Why is Hanoi home? I suppose it is because my parents and brother still live there, and because it is where I lived for the past 2 years. While I have now lived in Cardiff for over 5 months, I still feel like I cannot commit to it fully. I suppose I never really feel like I can commit to one place as being 'home', as I always end up leaving it, or if I don't, then my close friends do, people I care about, and 'home' is disrupted. So I have a backup 'home', a place where I know my family will be to catch me if I fall, to help me through the hard times, life a safe haven.

By now, you probably think I have serious commitment issues regarding places, and I do, but there is a flip side. Since my sense of 'home' is constantly changing, the meaning of the word has changed. According to the dictionary, 'home' is:

"The place in which one's domestic affections are centered"

For most, this is exactly what they mean by 'home'. For me; however, this definition of 'home' applies less and less with every move. A sense of 'home' is not so special anymore, and thus I use the word very loosely. When on holiday, my hotel room is 'home'. This is not because I do not know the proper usage of the word 'home', it is because I do truly feel that for that one week holiday, my hotel room is my 'home'. I take my sense of 'home' with me wherever I go, my 'home' is mobile. I think that this is unique to TCK's, as we have had to carry 'home' with us, as whenever we settle in a new place, we always know that we will be moving sooner or later, and that 'home' will have to come with us again. I envy people that truly treasure their 'home', that have had the same 'home' all their life, because the term is still so special.

Now, I am not attempting to write a sob story and have people feel sorry for me. Yes, there are a lot of downsides to being a TCK, this being one of them. Yet there are so many positive outcomes that being a TCK has, things that I will explore in following blog posts. I'm looking to create a balance through my blog, because being a TCK is not all good, but not all bad either, just like almost everything else out there.